Thursday, September 3, 2009

What would Devyn Burton Do?

Hello reader of Sarah’s blog. I am the one and only Devyn Burton. I have been asked by Sarah to stop by and help her readers with their daily problems.
Have you ever been in a squeeze and thought WHAT WOULD DEVYN BURTON DO (WWDBD)? Well wonder no longer my little children—now you can have the chance to KNOW what I would do!

I have collected a few questions to give an example:
“If they made a movie of your life, who would play you?” – KODY KEPLINGER
Well I would have to say TIM GUNN.
I would like to offer would like to offer EXHIBIT A. I have provided Sarah with a photo of Tim and myself.
If you look at the photo you can see we both make a suit work, we rock the glasses and have flawless smiles.
Clearly we are both divalicious men and would rock the shit out of the big screen.

HOWEVER, My fellow reader, these questions are no about ME—they are about YOU and your daily life issues like the following:

“Dear Devyn, How should I kill my annoying sister who uses the computer a lot. WWDBD?” – NOT SARAH’S BROTHER
Dear NOT SARAH’S BROTHER, Have you ever seen he film THE WIZARD OF OZ? I will teach you an easy way to eliminate your sister from your life—almost the same exact way that Dorothy took out the Wicked Witch of the West.
Wait until your sister has spent a decade on the internet (also known as five hours) at this point of internet usage she is most vulnerable. As soon as the clock strikes 300 minutes, run to the nearest internet source in hour house.
At this point you grab hold of the wireless adapter plug-in, ripping it clean from the wall. This will break your sisters decade of internet usage. Run quickly to where your sister is located, you will notice she has melted away into a puddle of tears.
Thus ending her forever, just like Dorothy took out that Witch!
AND dear reader this is where you come in!
Sit in your computer chair, stare at your computer, (check out Tim Gunn,) Close your eyes and think WWIADB (What Would I Ask Devyn Burton ?) when you have created a question leave it in the comment section below!

Note from Sarah: This is so funny. I love it.


  1. That's hilarious! I love the Not Sarah's Brother question and anwser.

  2. My mom won't let me get a unicorn. She says that they are too dangerous. So, I was wondering WWDBD?

  3. Dear Devyn,
    I need a week off work. I was thinking that I would contract a mild case of H1N1 aka OinkBarf. I have no ideas of how to go about this, so I was wondering WWDBD?
    -Not Korianne's Mom

    Dear Devyn,
    My house got TP'd on Easter. There is STILL a roll of toilet paper stuck up in the tree. I don't own a ladder plus I am scared of heights but my mother is demanding it come down. WWDBD in this situation?

    -Not Korianne's Sister

    Dear Devyn,
    I am having a bad week. First I charged my books to the wrong credit card and went over by $500, I now have to pay overdraft fees. Second my car engine blew up costing me $3000. Third today we found a rattle snake skin on our porch. It's going to cost big bucks to get the exterminator out here. I was wanting to plan a last minute trip to Michigan to see the most awesome person in the world but I don't have cash. WWDBD if he needed cash?

    -Not Korianne

  4. Dear Devyn,
    I have insomniac issues. How do I go about sleeping when I CANT!? WWDBD?

    - Some Random Person Who talks to both You and Sarah a lot.


Thanks for visiting. Every comment creates a smile.


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